Your Child and Homework

Most children hate doing homework; it restricts their freedom to play and is a grim reminder of school. They wonder why school has to continue at home also. So, it is quite normal for children to put up some kind of a fuss, which could be gentle grumbling or outright refusal.

While parents and teachers have learnt their lessons and can see the long-term benefits of studying, the children have yet to acquire such wisdom. Right now they think it is a pointless hassle that deprives them of doing fun things. Moreover, the child who finds the work hard finds the whole exercise even more demoralizing and discouraging. Under these circumstances, who would want to do homework?

So, if homework is to be done, you are going to need to set things up in a way that, to the child's way of thinking, outbalances all the negatives. You may never get to the point where she says, "Oh, goody! More homework to do! I can't wait!", but you may, at least, get to, "Well, I guess I had better get this homework done and out of the way."

How do you achieve that? Here are some suggestions:

1. Homework is not something your child loves doing. You need to inspire him to do it. So, shouting and screaming and losing your temper is not going to help. Try and create an atmosphere where your child is encouraged to study. Make it sound interesting by innovative ways. Turn it into a sort of game or at least create the perception that it is fun, so that your child gets involved in it.

2. Keep in touch with the school to find out how much homework is expected to be done and how long it should take. If your child takes more time or if the grades are consistently very poor, you should speak with the school. There may be some learning or attention difficulties that need to be addressed. That may be the underlying cause of not wanting to do homework. If your child finds the homework difficult to do on his own, you need to identify the problem and address it. You may want to speak to the teacher and ask if it is okay that your child spends a fixed amount of time on study even if he is not able to complete the given assignment. Some children are slow in writing, but that should not demoralize them.

3. If you can create a place that is conducive to working, it will help to make a routine. In any case, it is not easy to get homework done if you have to do it on your lap while everyone else is watching TV. Ideally you should have a study table in the child’s room where he can sit comfortably and concentrate on his work. But, if that is not possible, you can clear a space on the kitchen table by removing all distractions and interruptions.

4. Your child may need your help and support. As long as you don't start doing it for them, you must help him to get started. Sometimes, the child gets stuck because he hasn’t understood what he is required to do. Explain that to him, but encourage him to find the answers himself in books or on the internet. You can help with spelling questions or work through the problem in math. However you help, stay calm! Don’t expect unreasonable standards. It will only lead to frustration.

5. Lots of praise and encouragement. The first goal is to get it done, only after that is happening should you start to focus on quality! By and large let the teachers deal with the content of the work. Your job is to support the homework effort, and to encourage diligence and persistence. Let the teach correct the content. Having said that, you can, for example, encourage the child to read his work out loud so as to catch obvious spelling, punctuation, and syntax errors.

6. It is a good idea to set up a reward chart and give extra privileges, such as TV, or family treats for completion of homework on time. Later, you may add incentives for higher grades as well.

7. There may be a specific subject that is causing problems. For that you need to see the teacher and take her help and guidance to work on the deficient areas.

8. Often, the long-term projects become too unwieldy and burdensome. You can help your child break it down into smaller chunks for which you can set realistic goals and deadlines. This will help in getting the work done as well teach your child how to organize and plan.

9. Investigate whether the school has a homework club. Many schools provide a facility for children to stay on after the end of the day to complete their homework in a supervised setting. Often children find it easier to do that, than to try to fit in their homework at home around other family members, TV, meals and all the other distractions.

10. Finally, it is important to give the taste of success to your child. Failure is extremely discouraging and de-motivating. Success has its own charm; it is self-motivating and encourages more attempts. Once you achieve that, you will never have to bother about your child’s homework again.

Article Source: http://publisherscloninghouse.com

Dr. Noel Swanson's website provides free expert parenting tips & advice - just sign up for his newsletter and get a free chapter of his book, The GOOD CHILD Guide. You can also meet with other parents on a parenting forum.
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